Friday, April 13, 2012

My understanding of Supernatural

[because, apparently, having only seen one and a half seasons and tons of spoilers does not lend itself to understanding anything. And I want to preserve this so I can read over it once I’m done watching and shake my head over my past-self’s weirdness]

So, there are those two guys, Sam and Dean. And they clearly love each other. They’re practically head over heels for each other, willing to risk everything. Seeing as they spend most of their time mocking one another, their affection does not seem romantic in nature and seeing as they are brothers, I am withholding judgement on whether or not there is a sexual or erotic aspect to the whole thing, but… whatevers. Platonic doesn’t cut it, so… they have warm-fuzzy feelings for each other.

And their Dad manages to disappear himself somehow. And they try and find him and find a shit ton of evil, dark things instead. They kill the evil, dark things and find their Dad. An evil, dark thing in the body of a young girl (and some weird claw-y shadow) almost kill them. They run.

Someone gets killed for a gun. The boys and suddenly, their Dad, go and find the gun. Then their Dad gets himself caught, the boys get him out and kill some evil, dark thing’s kids in the process. Then the evil, dark thing possesses the Dad and tries to kill his kids in revenge. Dad can fight the evil, dark thing. They take Dean’s car and drive away. The evil, dark thing possesses a truck driver and crushes the car.

And, noooooooooooooooooooooooo, how dare you, don’t kill the car, it’s a Chevy Impala, how dare you, it’s such a beautiful car and why did you need to run it over and no, everything is lost, how could you do that… Oh. The boys and their father look kind of dead. But… the car. Why did you do this to her? She’s such a beautiful lady and does not deserve to be run over by such an ugly truck.

And then, after I got over my feelings for the Impala, Dean is dying and walking around in white clothes while Sam is fine and drinking coffee and summoning his brother’s spirit and getting mocked for it. Dad goes and sacrifices himself to the evil, dark thing and sacrifices the gun too, while he’s at it, and Dean stands and walks away.

They are sad that Dad is dead, and then they go back to hunting evil, dark things.

Stuff happens, also I didn’t have the time to watch any further, so from here on, it’s just speculation patched together by reading fanfic and spoilers.

Sam dies, preferably by falling down the stairs or getting eaten by Zombies. Then Dean goes and makes out with a demon to get him back. The demon seems to think him a bad kisser, so Dean’s life get’s shortened to one year, but Sam comes back. Sam is weird because he’s been in hell and Dean is weird because he’s going to die. They are awkward at each other.

Somewhere along the way, Sam disappears and Dean picks up a heavenly Bodyguard whom he tries to corrupt and who’s in warm-fuzzy feelings with Dean.

Also, somewhere along the way, people figure out that demons bleed when one cuts them and that drinking their blood gives one superpowers, which Sam wants to get his brother out of hell. Only it goes wrong and he becomes addicted to the blood and picks up a demon to follow him around.

More stuff happens, the world ends, apocalypse, whatever. Dean’s angel/bodyguard/whatever and Sam’s demon die because Dean and Sam love each other too much.

At some point during all this, slash fangirls ship Sam and Dean, which weirds them out and at another point, they end up on set of a TV-series that portrays them, which weirds them out too.

Generally, everyone spends a lot of time being weirded out about everything.

Also, everything exists apart from Sasquatch.